Being “Mom” & “Friend” – How to Balance the Two

How do I determine if I am “Mom” or “Friend” today? This something I have been struggling with since my oldest daughter started as a Freshman in High School this year. When I first gave birth to my beautiful baby girl, I did not once think that in 14 years she would go from this sweet bundle of joy to a bundle of flip-flopping hormones. Each day is now a mystery. Which child will I see at the end of the day? Will I have to act as mom, or as a friend? Will I need to decipher how her day went merely by her facial expression as she says “Hey” when she walks past me to get to the fridge?

When did I go from the mom who she loved spending time with to “the mom” who she can’t be seen with? When did I become “weird”? When did she change from that happy go-lucky girl to the girl with the problems that I can’t possibly understand, or so she thinks? I know, I know, every teenager goes through that and yes, I get that she is going to branch out and develop her own personality with and through her friends…but I don’t have to like it, I just have to figure out a way to get past it while still maintaining my own sanity.

I have communicated with her that no matter what, I will always be there. If she needs me one day and doesn’t the next, I will be there. I will be there if she just wants to vent about how sucky her life is, I will just listen and lend my shoulder. I will be there if she needs advice on how to handle certain situations, or if that one day she should ask advice about boys or friends, I’ll be there then too. I will even be there if she should happen to ask about what outfit to wear even though according to her I don’t have any style {I did have great style….long long ago when I wasn’t so dang tired}.

I think by now she knows that I will be there under any circumstance, but please share with me some of the things you have done to balance the whole “Mom” vs “Friend” moments. How have you dealt with the ever changing hormones of a teenage girl? I’d love to hear your teenage daughter stories!

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