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I hate the mirror.  The other day I was trying on clothes and there staring back at myself in the mirror, was me.  The view I saw was one I had seen many times over.  I have even posted about my struggles with weight loss and my motivation to give it a go, time and time again.  Each time, not following through.  I thought about why I wasn’t sticking with the program or plan and I really couldn’t come up with any good, solid, reason for it.  What I did come up with though were a lot of excuses; I’m so tired, I don’t feel good, my heel hurts, I can’t work out today it’s the first day of my period.  Yes, I have come up with many, many excuses.

That was until today.  Today I woke up and just knew that no matter what my struggle was, I was about to embark on a new attempt to lose weight.  I have seen many people post images online and use that as a way to motivate them or to inspire them or others with their progress.  Why couldn’t that be me?  Probably because I have always been super self-conscious of my body, from head to toe.

I’ve held a lot inside.  I use to be the “skinny” one in the family or within my group of friends.  It wasn’t until I had children… I can’t even say that it wasn’t until the last child was born that things went downhill.  I had gained “baby” weight, lost it, gained it again, lost it, and gained it yet again, but never lost it.  My baby just turned 12.  It’s time to lose it.

It’s Hard to lose weight!

Keeping a food diary never worked for me, neither has tracking calories in an app.  Perhaps I haven’t found the “right” way that felt natural to me.  I like pretty apps and apps that make me feel good.  I have recently found a few that I am going to explore and see how I do.

{App images contain my affiliate links}

Calorie tracking – My Net Diary Pro

Water Consumption – Plant Nanny  (you get a cute plant to water)

Weight Tracking – Happy Scale

Meditating & Anxiety Relief- Simple Habit & Pacifica

I am going to do something I have NEVER EVER done before; share my weight.  Here it goes… I am totally being as vulnerable as one could be!  I am super terrified to share this because I am not proud of it in any way.  When I got married I was 118 pounds, and now, I am 203.7!  This weight is NOT me.  Yes, I am older, my metabolism changed, I have had three children…yet there is no excuse for being lazy when it comes to my health.

No one can be harder on me than I am on myself, so all the haters can go right ahead and hate if they want to.  All that matters is ME and each and every step I take moving forward.  Just as my image above states, you have to learn to walk before you can run.  You have to also learn to take things one step at a time and that is exactly what I plan on doing, right here, right now, whether you are with me or against me.

I know that the key to weight loss is cutting back calories and increasing exercise.  One step at a time, though; I am going to aim for building new eating habits first then I will add exercise.  They say it takes about 21 days to form a new habit.  I will take today as Day 1 and will post frequently  (and update the weight status weekly).

I have also set up a Facebook Group for those who wish to have additional support.  Knowing what I know, facing this challenge alone can be very trying and I don’t want anyone to feel as alone as I have felt.  I hope you will join me and others conquer their weight loss goals….for real this time! 🙂

Maybe one day I’ll post a body shot but for now, you get to settle with looking at my feet.  Would you share a photo of your body if you needed motivation and accountability?